A man looks at a woman’s butt or breast as she walks by and he is called a pig.  A woman has a very low cut top and very petite shorts and she is called a slut.  Which is wrong? Are either wrong?  Many fathers would agree their daughters are dressed inappropriately.  Many girlfriends would agree their boyfriends are inappropriate for looking at another woman.  Both men and women are just as equally guilty.

            Men can help what they look at.  It may be hard to know when there is going to be a woman dressed in an indecent manner, but when she is seen, men could turn their head.  It would be hard, but the right thing to do. Why is it the right thing to do?  Jesus Christ said “’whoever looks at a woman to lust for her has already committed adultery with her in his heart’” (Matthew 5:28).  This applies to the married and unmarried.  If a man lusts after a woman, he is committing adultery against his wife or future wife. 

            “I don’t care or believe in God,” one may say.  “So it’s not wrong for me to look at another woman.”  That is absolutely true.  If one does not believe in God, he has no basis for morals or standards of living.  Even so, there are reasons turning of the head when a temptatious woman is in view is worth it.  If a man looks at another man’s wife and wants to have sex with her, or just wants to see more of her, her husband would most likely not be happy.  Good husbands and fathers do not want men to look at their wives and daughters in that way.  If a man thinks and feels that way about any other woman besides his wife, it is only fair to assume that there are other men that want to look at or have sex with his wife or daughter.  If the man is a bad husband or father, where he thinks it’s okay to cheat on a spouse, then he is not wrong at all in his mind. 

            A man turning his head causes or will cause strife in a relationship.  A man’s wife wants to be the most beautiful view his eyes could ever see.  Any other woman he looks at, even if all he thinks is “she’s pretty,” hurts his wife.  Imagine what other thoughts will do.  Many times, women will play off as if it does not bother them, but it does.  Some women have just accepted that they will not be the most beautiful to their husbands and try not to let it get to them.  Other women have it set in their minds that all men are pigs and only care about sex.  These women, deep inside, still want to be the most beautiful to their husbands, but every time her husband looks at another woman, she doubts if she will ever be the most beautiful to him.

            Women can help how they dress and act.  Men can help what they look at, but it may be too late by the time they catch themselves.  These “too late” moments could be lowered in numbers tremendously if women would just learn how to dress properly.  When and why did shirts that barely cover breasts, and shorts that are barely mid-thigh and skin tight become Amish?  Women need to begin to wear higher shirts and longer shorts, and maybe a little looser.  Modest clothing may be hard to find, but no impossible.  Shirts that are low cut can be worn with undershirts.  Old pants can be cut off if longer shorts cannot be found.  Holes and rips in jeans are in style anyway. 

            Some women dress very modestly, but do not hesitate to emphasize all they have.  Dressing modestly is only half of it.  Grabbing breasts so all can see, defeats the purpose.  The way a woman moves, such as in dirty dancing, defeats modesty as well.  All know that certain things are present on a woman; there is no need to emphasize them.  In addition to how a woman moves, a woman should be careful of her clothing in certain instances.  No matter how modest an outfit can be, there are some things that just cannot be helped.  When a woman bends over, she needs to be careful of her shirt falling down.  Some things cannot be helped, but should be prevented if possible.  One small thing could cause a man to sin.

            “It’s all men’s fault.  They can watch where they look.”  Many women think it is okay to dress immodestly because it is just the man’s responsibility to watch what he thinks.  Some women may even dress in that manner on purpose to get that kind of attention.  Causing someone to sin is not a joke; it is serious business.  “But beware lest somehow this liberty of yours become a stumbling block to those who are weak” (I Corinthians 8:9).  Dressing in an improper manner could cause others to sin.  One will face judgment for this.  Is it really worth causing strife within another person’s marriage?  Ultimately, that is what is happening if a woman is causing a man to commit adultery with her in his heart.

            Again, what about those who do not care or believe in God?  Well, if a woman is dressed in an improper manner and is causing other men to lust after her, then it is fair to assume that there are other women dressed improperly causing that woman’s husband to lust after other women.  If a woman wants her husband to be true to her, she needs to do her part in allowing her husband only to see what she has.  A wife cannot ask a man to keeps his eyes for only her if she is allowing the view to be seen by all those who are unwelcomed.

            One would say, “I will never get married, so what does it matter?”  No one knows for certain of their future.  God may have marriage in His plan for one’s life.  No one can be certain.  Either way, it is still a sin.  Is looking at a woman or causing a man to think sinful thoughts really worth the harsh punishment that will come when standing before God, who can crush the earth with one word?

            Men and women are both responsible for lust that goes on outside of a marriage.  Men should turn their head when a temptatious woman is in view; this goes for real life, television, and the computer.  Women need to watch how they dress and learn how a man’s mind really thinks.  Women do not understand how big of a temptation it can be.  Fathers, husbands, and boyfriends, it is time to teach daughters, wives, and girlfriends how much of a temptation lust is.  Daughters, wives, and girlfriends, it is time to ask fathers, husbands, and boyfriends if what is being worn could cause another man to sin.  Be honest; be open.  Marriages and relationships would have far less problems if men and women would just follow these simple guidelines that God has set into place.


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